Cheer Up. After All, They Could Be Right.

“But it does make you feel smaller, which is a relief in some ways. When you screw up, it seems less terrible. all these people, everybody screwing up.” - Rebecca Sherm

2016. It’s fair to say that there are a hell of a lot of people who will be glad to see the back of it. Do I need to catalogue the numerous reasons why? The legendary artists who passed away? Syria and the resultant migration crisis? The Nice terrorist atrocity? Brexit? Trump? And as the year draws to a close, another horrifying attack on innocent shoppers at a Christmas market in Berlin is a tragic footnote to a grim year. Sprinkle in a seemingly endless deluge of negative news about the environment, global economics, austerity and health epidemics and you have a literally perfect annus horribilis. To think the year started with the Zika virus. Who would of thought that was going to be the year’s high point? There was a time when Halloween was the scariest night of the year – now it’s election night.

In keeping with the increasingly insular and self-centred perspective that has become a societal norm in Europe and America, it’s fair to say that Brexit and Trump have been the truly seismic events. No doubt the wretched civilians in Aleppo, Yemen and myriad oppressed communities the world over would disagree but we’ve always done selfishness well in the West and I’m nothing if not a product of my environment. The reality is that we’re all concerned with that which is most personal to us and in the UK, Brexit and Trump are and will be the things that affect us the most. The cults of personality that populist politics manifested along with their bilious rhetoric and nationalistic policies, have undoubtedly created the perfect conditions for opportunistic xenophobes and racists who worship at the feet of these fascistic demagogues. The rise in hate crimes and casual acceptance of utter falsehoods reported as facts and meekly challenged by the 4th Estate are further consequences (or is that casualties?) of Brexit and Trump. Despondency, hopelessness, fear and depression are quite natural reactions for those who are against both of these political ideologies and the fact that they are on the far right of the political spectrum has exacerbated the apprehension. I don’t want to make anyone who considers themselves as left wing feel bad, but perhaps you will feel infinitely worse over the next four years or so. After all, what if the right are right?

Now before you liberals choke to death on your quinoa salads and kale smoothies, I’m not suggesting the right are correct in their views on gender equality, race relations, the environment, welfare, criminal justice…..actually I can’t think of anything that I agree with them about. No matter how many times Farage insults the widower of a murdered MP or Uberfuhrer Drumpf tweets his ‘'unpresidented’ comments, for some reason I just can’t seem to ignore the feeling that they’re a pair of human skidmarks. The Donald in particular is so excruciatingly unembarrassed by his proven lies, broken promises and conflict of interest that he proves for maximum attention, nothing beats a good mistake. But to me, extremely left-wing people are as annoying and sanctimonious as those on the extreme right because becoming part of a movement doesn’t assist anybody in thinking clearly. Frankly, as much as the rise of the right has appalled me, the whining of the left has just pissed me off. They should tell me what they need and I’ll tell them how to get along without it. As a black man I have experience in this field.

Just imagine if you will, a future in which Trump’s infrastructure program has successfully regenerated a portion of the coal industry in the U.S. Face it, the coal produced in West Virginia is the highest quality in the world and perfect for making steel, which will be needed in abundance to build the bridges, buildings and roads the sunburnt Stalin says he will invest in. Plus he might actually start using American steel as opposed to Chinese for his hotels. Anyway, the economy gets a bump, his supporters feel like he’s kept a promise and he looks vaguely competent. The new ‘Rusmerica’ alliance of Vlad and Don strikes mortal blows to the ‘Fundamentalist Islamic terrorist’ networks because they are willing to forsake all of the pesky human rights we were so preachy about in the West, and proceed to assassinate the families of suspected terrorists. Or waterboard them. Or bomb the shit out of them. Or whatever. Then he expels say, about 3 million undocumented migrants. I feel pretty certain that would be enough to get him re-elected and create enough fodder for the propaganda machine – I mean Fox News – and the fake news sites to exaggerate Drumpf’s competence as president. With Brexit, all bets are off. The laudable democratic experiment did more harm than good. An inter-generational war is brewing between old and young, the nation is so divided it makes the U.S look like the Waltons and there are many more complicated issues that have arisen than there are suitable solutions offered. In fact our politicians have offered none. So one imagines that if the UK is still a functioning society in four years that will count as success.

So liberals, don’t waste your energy getting upset now. It’s very possible you’ll have plenty of time and much more reason to cry in four years when Orange Hitler and his acolytes hypnotise enough fearful people to convince them that he’s been a success.